Advice on helping your elderly parents make the transition to a senior living facility

Watching our parents get older and become less mobile and independent is never easy. As time goes on and deteriorating mental or physical health makes it more difficult for them to continue living in their own home, it may well be time to consider a move to an assisted living facility. This might sound daunting and upsetting, but it is often the best decision to make for the well-being of your aging parents. Of course, that doesn’t make the change easy. To help you out, here is some advice on how to make the transition to a senior living facility as smooth as possible for both you and your loved one.

Before the move

One of the most important requirements is to have an open and honest conversation in person about the topic before any decisions are made. It’s a good idea to raise the possibility of moving to an assisted living facility early on to give your parents time to get used to the idea and ensure that no one feels like the choice has been rushed. Make sure that you listen carefully to any concerns that your parents have about the move, acknowledge their feelings, and try to respect their wishes as much as possible. You want this to feel like a decision that you have made together, not one that has been forced upon anyone. Of course, this will depend on your parents’ health condition and mental capacities, and if you feel that you are in an emergency situation, you may have to act more quickly. You can also consider hiring a reputed moving company to make the whole process flawless for you and your parents. Transport website Shiply can help you much in finding such moving company.

Another helpful strategy can be to visit a number of assisted living facilities to take tours and see what living there would actually be like. Many people have negative images of such places, but facilities such as Belmont Senior Living are vibrant and supportive environments, with a wide range of social activities and wellness programs on offer. It’s not like living in a hospital – although, of course, they have expert medical care – and there’s still a high level of independence for residents. It might even be possible for your mom or dad to take part in some activities at some centers before choosing one for a more immersive and realistic experience of what life is like there. If they already know someone who lives in an assisted living center, see if they can visit them for a more personal chat about it.

Once you and your parents have seen what senior living facilities have to offer, you can focus on all the positive aspects of making the move. Discuss the added safety and peace of mind, the benefits of not having to do household chores such as cleaning and laundry, the increased social interaction, and the chance to take up new hobbies. If your parents are strongly resistant to the idea, then don’t push it – wait for the opportunity to talk about it to naturally arise in relation to difficulties they’re having at home.

Try and get your parents’ input on all aspects of the decision too. For example, would they prefer to live in a large, modern assisted living facility or a smaller and more cozy one? Is there a facility where one of their friends is living that might be appropriate? What level of support do they hope to have, and what type of services are most important to them? Knowing all of this will help you both to make the right decision when the time comes.

After the move

Once your parent has moved into a senior living facility, the first few days and weeks will be critical for making sure that everyone feels confident the correct decision has been made. It may well take a few months for your mom or dad to settle in fully, but there are some things you can do to help ease the transition. For example, try and visit as often as you can to show your parents that you haven’t abandoned them and help with those initial feelings of nervousness and loneliness. At the same time, try not to let them become too reliant on you being there. This is key for them to adapt to their new home. If you can’t visit in person, make regular phone calls or video chats instead. The staff at the facility will be well versed in how to best handle this situation, so don’t be afraid to ask for their advice. Keeping in contact with them regarding your parents’ progress, needs, and health condition is important, and together you can come up with a plan for how to ensure they settle in as quickly and easily as possible.

One great tactic is to surround your parents with familiar belongings from home. Make sure they have family photos on display in their room, their favorite coffee mug, music, and books, plus any other comforting items that can reasonably be brought with them. This will help them to feel at ease much more quickly. Similarly, see if they can keep parts of their usual routine in their new home, such as receiving a daily newspaper to do the crossword with a cup of tea in the morning. Change can be scary, so all of these little familiarities can make the move easier on you both.

A period of adjustment is only natural, so be prepared for some ups and downs in the beginning. Try not to dismiss your parents’ concerns, though. Listen to what they have to say, and don’t trivialize their concerns. See if you can work out solutions, either with your parents or by talking to the staff at the facility. Encourage your mom or dad to take part in the social activities and wellness programs, although don’t be pushy. These are often some of the best ways for newcomers to meet their fellow residents, make friends, take up new hobbies, and see how much fun senior living can be. Before too long, you might find they’re too busy to talk to you when you call!